25 weeks and I’ve just kind of popped! I think up until last week I was able to “hide” my pregnancy – not that I was trying but certain outfits just kept it wear under cover. In fact, one of my nursery coworkers didn’t even know I was pregnant until Sunday. I’m also to the point where I feel comfortable wearing tighter tops because it’s obvious I’m pregnant and didn’t just have a big lunch. Not only am I looking pregnant but I am feeling it! Take a look at these images from today – I look so tired!
I also feel like I look like I have gained all of the 16 extra pounds the scale showed me yesterday at my Centering Group appointment. For some reason seeing that 139.4lbs show up on the scale was hard for me to swallow. I’m still working on accepting it even though I KNOW that I am right on target, have not gained more than I should, and am still eating healthy and staying active. It’s still a hard thing to do, I’ve never been this heavy before. But, baby girl is healthy and I am grateful!
Strangely enough we talked at Centering about how we are sleeping and I had been sleeping really well lately and of course jinxed it by saying it out loud. I hope I didn’t keep P up last night. I can not get comfortable and I got really hot. As much as Snoogle helps with comfort and support most nights, it gets really hot! I can’t sleep with covers on any more.
Other developments this week, I’m back to that uncomfortable feeling of I know that I am growing because I can feel it. No one tells you that you will feel you body stretching and how it doesn’t feel good! It’s also getting somewhat difficult to bend over these days, although I think it depends on where the baby is. I’m also getting more tired and staying more tired. I hit a wall at 3:30pm pretty much every day! I just work through it because I’m an awful napper. It takes a while for me to fall asleep and then once I wake up (if I ever sleep at all) I feel groggy so there’s really no point. I do feel bad for my team at work though because my patience and mood definitely take a decline around that time. I tend to get a second wind by 6ish especially if I make it to the gym. I’ve been able to cook the last few weeks which I know P enjoys. Not just meals for lunch and dinner but also I’ve done some baking so we have nice, healthy treats for breakfasts and snacks.
I’m starting to get more excited about labor than nervous and scared. I think its my innate curiosity taking over. Instead of focusing on the fear of the unknown I’m focusing on the curiosity and the desire for knowledge. I’m starting to lean more towards a natural birth, if I can do it. Actually, I know I CAN do it, it’s just a matter of whether or not I’ll have the strength in the moment. I’ve been reading books, like Ina May’s Guide to Natural Childbirth, and also talking a lot in my midwife’s group (Centering) and I just feel like I can do it. I’m even starting to feel like I want to labor, if not deliver although maybe?, in the water. I’m trying to keep on open mind and an open birth plan, trusting my body and my doctor/midwife. I’m just getting really excited to meet this little girl!
P has been working hard in the nursery, installing shelves and painting the built-ins. His mom comes next weekend to pick out a crib and then once we have it and a rocking chair the nursery will be ready for decorating. I’m excited to see it come together and I love that baby girl will know that her daddy did all of it for her.
I’m feeling calm right now which is not really typical for me. I’m usually high-strung and stressed. I definitely have my moments but I feel like I’m going pretty good not going into mom-to-be-zilla mode even though we only have three months left and they are super busy months with lots of travel. Baby is going to come when she comes and we will be “ready” or not – more than likely not, even if we have all the parts and pieces in order.
I’m treasuring these last few months with just P and our little family of 2 but cannot wait to meet this little girl, who is still unnamed and whose parents have still not even talked about names… she’ll get one when one feels right! I do have one in my head but we will see if it continues to feel good and if P likes it. We will see!